Spooky season is here! Which means Halloween is right around the corner. It’s often a pleasant time of year to watch the leaves change and embrace the cooler weather. But if you have recently gone through a divorce or separated from your co-parent, it may be a stressful time of year. During this season, kids look forward to trick-or-treating, dressing up in costumes, and enjoying fun fall activities with their parents. Despite your recent divorce or separation, you can still have fun with your children during this time of year... maybe even having the opportunity to include your co-parent as well. Luckily, there are plenty of options around Halloween for you and your family!
If you and your former spouse are on good terms, try these ideas: Trick-or-Treating with a group. Trick-or-treating with other parents and their kids can create a fun dynamic for your children, you, and your former spouse. Having other parents to talk to can ease the tension and awkwardness you may feel around your co-parent. This can be really helpful if you have supportive friends that know about the divorce and are supportive of you both continuing as collaborative co-parents.
Watching a Halloween movie with your kids. A movie can be a great way to spend family time together with limited conversations or tension. Or you and your co-parent can host a small get together by inviting your kids’ friends and parents over to watch movies, creating more of a group dynamic.
Attending fall festivities. A fall event, such as a fair or a pumpkin patch, is a perfect place to gather as a family and spend time with your kids. Even if you and your former spouse are still trying to find your groove as co-parents, having a space where there’s a lot of activities can be helpful. It not only keeps your kids active with a lot of activities, but also allowing you to take a moment for yourself as well. If things are feeling awkward or tense, you can always step away for a moment and get a funnel cake by yourself or with your kids. Or maybe a haunted house is more of your family’s speed. The screams and cries of a haunted house can be helpful to engage in some laughter and take your mind off of any anxious thoughts or feelings you may have.
If you and your former spouse are not on good terms, try these ideas:
Trick or treat with one parent and bake Halloween treats with the other parent. There is no need to panic if you and your co-parent are not ready to be in the same space yet for a long period of time. One of you can go trick-or-treating with the kids, while the other parent can bake treats or watch a movie with the kids before or after trick-or-treating. You can both agree to spend equal time with your kids on Halloween during different times of day, or with different fun activities that make your kids happy and puts less tension on your mind.
Attend fall festivities separately. If you and your co-parent are not on great terms, you can always take your kids to a pumpkin path, an apple orchard, and/or a haunted house on separate occasions.
Exchange holiday parenting time. If one parent celebrates Halloween more than the other parent, your co-parent may be willing to exchange Halloween for another holiday. The parent who really values Halloween can often have that holiday in exchange for the other parent having a holiday they care more about.
Having trouble finding holiday solutions with your co-parent? Mediation can help you work through your conflict and find solutions, even after your divorce is finalized.
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